A Rose By Any Other Name

I'm getting a lot of stuff from the algorithm about baby names.  Which is far better than the usual stuff targeting my demographics.  Stupid anti-aging creams.  At least names are something I'm interested in.  But I digress....

Most of it is about unusual spellings and created names.  Some of them include names that have simply fallen out of use.  Which frankly speaks more to the lack of research by whoever wrote the article/list than it does about the layman who bestows the name on the child.  

****

To use an example from my own life: My grandmother was Lura.  She went to her grave believing a couple of  Lauras running around were named after her.  The only time it was a problem was when she got a new store credit card with Laura on it.  We had to speak to a supervisor to get it fixed, because the customer service guy insisted we were wrong and/or she should change her name. 

But in truth, the names are not related.  One is Germanic and one is Latin.  One refers to the mermaids of the Rhine and the other to a type of tree.  These articles like to claim Lura is a new variant of Laura.  

*****

There's a phrase I see a lot: This name is a Trajedeigh.  It's mostly about creative spelling, so I'll focus on that first.  I take no issue with creative spellings as long as I can still tell how the name is pronounced.  Ashley can be Ashleigh or Ashlee.  Both spellings are phonetically sound and the first is based on the traditionally female Leigh. My own name has several standard spellings.  

Trajedeigh is also about a rumored trend of people naming kids words they like the sound of, but do not know the meaning of.  Things like Chlamydia.  (Why is anyone using a word they don't know the meaning of? I can't even deal with not knowing what a word played in Scrabble means.  But I digress...)  I know and even previously blogged about how people rarely choose a name for its traditional meaning.  "I just like the sound of it" is even a valid reason in my book.  BUT... this is why we tell our loved ones what names we're considering.  So someone can warn us off.  

*****

Another theme I see a lot of is the theft of a name.  Sometimes it's pretty egregious... Sister-in-law is eight month pregnant with a girl she has always planned to name Henrietta, so I have a girl and name mine Henrietta.  Or adopt a pet and name it Henrietta.  But often it isn't a theft at all.  Suppose Henrietta is named after Grandma... and both mothers were keeping the name as a surprise.... 

Intent is important.  When I was in my early teens, I announced to my family what I intended to name my children.  Everyone knew Artemis and Tanner were my names.  If anyone in my family had used either of those names without at least talking to me about it, that would have been a name theft.  As it is, now I keep hoping someone will "steal" them.

*****

Race and Religion all play a role in the naming of children.  Those get ignored a lot in the articles that spawned this blog post.  I've seen the author called out on more than one for dissing traditional naming practices... again, that goes back to the author's lack of research.  Sometimes I think I put more research into these blog posts than these professionals are putting into their work. 

But I digress... 

***** 

My primary suggestion is to share your name choice before birth, if only with trusted friends.  They will give you a heads-up on the following possible issues:  Short forms, nicknames, availability on souvenirs, variant spellings, pop culture associations, and many more. 

Oh, and think twice before calling her by her middle name.  Explaining that becomes tedious real fast. 

Life In The Struggle

 Maybe I'll end up deleting this without posting.  Maybe I won't.  I have warring feelings about it.

My demon has really been rattling her cage lately.  I'm not sleeping well.  My writing has stuttered to a halt.  So... 

****

The second Trump Administration has Sybrie The Tenth (said demon)  all riled up.  Everything they do seems like an attack aimed directly at me.  Well, not me personally, but most of my demographics.  Cuts to the federal programs I depend on to allow me a measure of independence. (I know that's an oxymoron, but deal with it.)  Social Security is probably safe - most politicians know that would be career suicide - but my apartment is HUD/Section Eight.  My Medicare (thru SS) is supplemented by Medicaid and Food Stamps, both of which have already been meddled with.  Every time I pick up my prescriptions, the total cost is different.  Not by a huge amount but enough to bother me.  Since I'm disabled, I don't have to put in work hours to "earn" my benefits.  Yet.  Talk of denying Food Stamp recipients things like soda pop and candy bars only bother me in principle - I do a pretty good job of focusing on healthier options.  But every now and then I do like a treat. 

I'm also one of those "childless cat ladies" who "want to make the rest of the country miserable, too".  Sort of... none of my minions are legally or biologically my offspring and my apartment lease precludes  pets.  

Y'all know I'm aggressively nonpartisan (antipartisan?) because I got loved ones all over the political spectrum.  I do avoid the fanatics.  Same with religion.

****

I recently learned that my antidepressant makes me less tolerant of heat.  I figured it was just my age and weight getting to me.  But no, the very medicine I credit with giving me the last 30 years and relative sanity is keeping me inside the air conditioning.  Which aggravates my sinusitis.  YAY another medical issue conflict.  

When I fell a couple winters ago, the ER doc diagnosed arthritis in my knee.  I suspect I have it in the other knee and my assorted old injuries.  Self-diagnosed carpal tunnel and tennis elbow. Nothing horrible, honestly, just an assortment of aches and pains.

I eat reasonably well, but could stand to exercise more.  In the words of my doctor, one of my diabetes medications "keeps the weight on".  We tried changing it but I did not react well to the new option.  I do walk when conditions permit and enjoy a stroll through the woods. Not a hike, a stroll.

****

Social contact, even just with the cashier in a store, gives me some sense of mattering.  I do exist!  I stay active on Facebook, keep in touch with friends and family that way or via telephone.  So I'm not isolated even if I feel that way sometimes.  Like when outside conditions keep me inside my hidey-hole.

I think I will go ahead and post this.  Even if it does look like "Boohoo feel sorry for me", maybe it will help someone out there.  I know getting it off my chest has helped me. 

Maybe We Should

 Psychology tells us that humans respond better to praise than to criticism.  So why have I been told, more than once, that I shouldn't expect thanks for doing what I'm supposed to do?

Some of it is our human predilection to take things and people for granted. It's easy to forget how much work our loved ones put into their chores, their commitments, and to assume they know we appreciate it.  It's easy for us to forget we appreciate it!

We praise our little ones for picking up after themselves, but stop at some point because now they know what to do.  We thank people for going out of their way for us, but not for the day-to-day stuff.  When was the last time a member of your household was thanked for doing dishes or taking out the trash?

If you pick up litter day after day and no one steps in to help, no one says thanks, and maybe even they toss trash around willy-nilly because they know you'll pick it up.. you get tired of it.  You become discouraged.  You stop doing it.  Imagine how long you could go on with positive reinforcement.

How much employment burnout would we relieve? How much teen rebellion is based on the notion that we only notice them when they misbehave?  For that matter, how many suicides could be prevented?

Should we praise positive behaviors as well as (or even instead of) punishing negative ones?  Maybe we should.  

Maybe we should.

Another One "Gone Woke" That Already Was

 

I recently visited the home of Laura Ingalls Wilder in Mansfield, Missouri.  Where she wrote the Little House books that made her famous.  I'm sure my older sisters read those books to me until I was able to read on my own.

I remember when they made a TV show based on the books.  I remember being disappointed that TV Pa had no beard.  Growing up with the books, Pa's entire description was beard and blue eyes.  But I let that go.  Even as a child, I understood about compromise. (How could I not?  I had seven siblings!)

As it happened, Pa's facial hair was the least of the changes.  On a previous visit to Rocky Ridge, at some point in my twenties, I spent most of the time saying things like "that person did not exist" and "that didn't happen that way" to a TV-show fan.

That said, the television show clung to the values of the books.  Even the books were altered from historical fact.  Laura's recollections were rearranged to fit a juvenile fiction format, but she accepted that as long as her deeper truths, her values, remained.

I did post previously about the Laura Ingalls Wilder award for children's literature getting a name change, because of things in the books that are racist by today's standards.  Negro and Indian, in her time, were not racial slurs.  The minstrel show in a later book was a common event for the time. 

The entire family's lives are saved early on by a black man (historical documents tell us he was Dr. George Tann) and the Ingalls family demonstrates compassion for the Osage of Kansas even as Ma fears them.  When the old Indian warns the citizens of De Smet about the deadly winter storms of 1880-1881, his knowledge is respected.  

There have been countless other LIW projects. But the books and TV show are the benchmarks. 

Netflix is producing a new show based on the books.  The town is Independence, Kansas, which lines up with the third book in the series.  The actresses playing Laura and Mary are eleven and fourteen, which closer to the fifth book.  Carrie doesn't seem to exist, which lines up with none of the books.  Dr George Tann exists, consistent with book three.  So already they've shattered any continuity with reality or the books' timeline.  

As for the values that Laura insisted upon?  People are complaining that the show's "gone woke".  How dare they push pretty much the same values Laura did, that Michael Landon did!  The details of the Ingalls' history may be distorted, but the values look to be holding and I see nothing historically inaccurate in the broad strokes.

I gotta laugh so I don't cry.  Or get angrier than is good for me. 

Professionalism in Politics

 It wasn't all that long ago that Americans were freaking out over the POTUS wearing a tan suit.  Cries across the land of "unpresidential" "unprofessional" and even "tacky" echoed from the purple mountain majesties and the fruited plain.  

Maybe it's because I'm nonpartisan, I saw nothing wrong with the tan suit.  I thought it made a nice change from the usual navy or black, a bit of individuality in a cookie-cutter profession, but ultimately I'm more invested the the POTUS's policies and character.   

Today I'm sure I'm not the only one wishing for the tan suit scandal. Not because of how the current POTUS dresses, but because of how he and many of our elected officials are behaving.  I'm not talking about what these people say and do in private, or even in a casual public moment.  I'm talking about official communications (and yes, that includes the social media of any given office.)  

Partisans are quick to point out that the other party forced a dementia patient onto us.  Some nonpartisans suspect said patients were put into place by "handlers".  But dementia is not so much a question of professionalism as it is a question of capability.   So I'm going to ignore that question. 

It upsets me that two of the most common current political catchphrases -- ones used by professionals -- are FJB and FDT.  Imagine walking into a job interview and saying that about the other applicants.  Imagine telling the interviewer mean things about the previous holders of the position.  Smear campaigns used to be the most unprofessional thing they did... not any more. 

Politics has always been an ugly thing.  But up until 2016 (yes, I'm beating that dead horse again) everyone put on their company manners.  Profanity, especially words that get bleeped on TV, would be career suicide.  But now... slogans like FDT and FJB are shouted in the streets.  

I don't want a POTUS who looks like he just mowed the lawn, but I'd prefer that to one who acts and sounds like a frat boy.  Or something worse.  

Still Dreaming

During the months between Christmas and Easter, I develop Seasonal Affective Disorder on top of my Dysthymia.  The worst manifestation of this is the nightmares. The details change, but the theme remains: everyone is mad at me for something beyond my control.  

Sleep is usually a refuge for me.  It's an escape from a world that sees me as a failure.  Part of my waking routine is to remind myself of all the ways that I did not fail.  I usually refer to it as "waking up slow".  I probably picked up that term from one of my minions (speaking of ways in which I did not fail). 

During the Christmas/Easter gap, though, that routine becomes harder.  It's difficult to remember I'm loved when I'm waking from a nightmare that tells me otherwise, night after night.  It's a long dark haul from Santa's visit to the Bunny's.

Recent events and the current political climate have shaken my resolve, I won't lie to you.  My pie-in-the-sky dream of winning Publisher's Clearing House is over.  PCH is gone.  Sometimes I pick up a lottery ticket, keeping that dream alive.  I know it's unlikely but I freely admit to needing that crutch.  

My faith in the Founders' checks and balances has been shaken badly by partisanship, which shows us exactly why the Founders were opposed to political parties.  But the party currently in power is experiencing a schism and elections are coming. There's hope still. The American Dream ain't dead.

Easter is almost here. Spring has already sprung.  And I'm still dreaming. 

Artificial Intelligence

 I joke about my aversion to AI.  I say things like "I've seen Terminator".  That's an extreme take on the situation.  It's unlikely that things will ever reach that point.  But I said the same thing about Donald Trump doing the very things he is now doing.  Make of that what you will.

Anyway, my aversion to AI is based more on the misuse of the tool and the environmental impact.  We aren't curing cancer, we're making cute little cartoons of ourselves and videos of Barbie committing arson.  We already have tools to do those things!  Tools that do not autonomously commit plagiarism and taint ground water! 

When AI gets a prompt, say "write a children's book, with illustrations, about divorce", what it does is look through its database and steal bits and pieces of copyrighted works and smush them together.  And I'm not even going to get into the data-mining it does on the prompter.  It can lead to misinformation because AI does not fact check.  

Not to mention that the purported author has poured none of their blood, sweat, and tears into the work.  Literally or otherwise.  This applies to all art forms and homework.  

The processors generate a lot of heat and are usually water-cooled.  The water picks up contaminants and is then released, thus sharing them with the world.  If it is possible to use a closed system for cooling - some sources say it is not - the companies that operate the AI don't use them.  Because they cost more.  We're tainting our water supply so we can giggle at bunnies on a trampoline. 

I freely admit to being something of a Luddite.  I worry that we humans depend on it too much. And it's hard to detect the line between Photoshop and "make a picture of Aunt Suzie in Rome".  One has, after all, grown from the other.  But art is a uniquely human thing.  Better to use this technology for science.  Creating an affordable closed system for cooling the processors would be an excellent start. Then march into the battle against incurable disease.