Mayor Pete (one of the fellows running for president) said that being gay helps him to understand what black folks go through. I'm not gonna weigh in on him, his policies, or any of that. I just want to talk about this specific error in his thinking.
Yes, being marginalized will give you some idea of what others experience. I've spend my whole life on and off Welfare and now I'm on SSDI. So I understand about people judging and about getting the stink-eye. But I can't really understand being black because - simple fact - I'm white. Each marginalized group has their own struggles.
I understand what it's like to have a store detective follow me around, but not because of my skin color. I've gotten snide comments for my choice of partner, but not because it was another gal. A person of color who has been fortunate enough to have never drawn benefits isn't going to understand the shame of whipping out that Food Stamp card.
Mayor Pete wasn't lying. Being marginalized, in any manner, does help us to understand each other. To a point. He's a rich white boy, so obviously he's not going to get what the poor, the people of color, or the women specifically deal with. That doesn't make him evil. It doesn't make any of us evil. Just human. And that's okay.
Tuesday, February 11, 2020
Thursday, February 6, 2020
OK, Boomer
I just had a long conversation about politics with a teenager. I'm either late Boomer or early GenX, depending on who you ask. He's Gen Z (Post-Millennial). According to the labels, we should be at each other's throats. We were not. This will blow the collective mind of those who allow labels to divide us.
This applies to all the labels, be it "Liberal" or "Female" or "Catholic" or "Gay". But for the sake of being concise, I will focus on the generation gap. "Respect your elders" has become "OK Boomer". "From the mouths of babes" has become "Damn millennial". And it disgusts me.
Their world is quite different from mine, and from what the world was when I was their age. That does create differences. But I stand by my assertion that there are more similarities than differences in all of us. They have friends and family, as do I. They have the same bodily functions. They have hearts and minds, most of them good ones.
The tendency to allow differences to divide us isn't new. I think it's fair to blame most of history's wars on it. The axiom about not mentioning religion or politics in social situations is rooted in it. We can't, as so many people do, blame it on anything more recent than the saber-toothed tiger. Blame isn't really the issue, anyway. The issue is us. Our behavior.
The conversation that led to this blog is a good example. The Boy expressed the opinion that a certain celebrity would be a viable candidate for the presidency. I said I think he's not because he's not a natural born US citizen. The Boy thought he was. Instead of calling each other names, we researched it. When we discovered I was correct, we discussed how the man could become a viable candidate, which gave me a chance to educate a bit. I wasn't familiar with the guy, and The Boy educated me a bit. Neither of us dismissed the opinion of the other. Neither of us called the other names.
The generation gap is our fault, people. We don't respect them but expect them to respect us and respect is a two-way street. Labeling one another is fine, it helps keep our mental files in order, but there are limits. We're all human, with all the things that make us so, and we're all carrying around a myriad of labels. If you don't want to be dismissed for one of your labels, don't dismiss others for theirs.
This applies to all the labels, be it "Liberal" or "Female" or "Catholic" or "Gay". But for the sake of being concise, I will focus on the generation gap. "Respect your elders" has become "OK Boomer". "From the mouths of babes" has become "Damn millennial". And it disgusts me.
Their world is quite different from mine, and from what the world was when I was their age. That does create differences. But I stand by my assertion that there are more similarities than differences in all of us. They have friends and family, as do I. They have the same bodily functions. They have hearts and minds, most of them good ones.
The tendency to allow differences to divide us isn't new. I think it's fair to blame most of history's wars on it. The axiom about not mentioning religion or politics in social situations is rooted in it. We can't, as so many people do, blame it on anything more recent than the saber-toothed tiger. Blame isn't really the issue, anyway. The issue is us. Our behavior.
The conversation that led to this blog is a good example. The Boy expressed the opinion that a certain celebrity would be a viable candidate for the presidency. I said I think he's not because he's not a natural born US citizen. The Boy thought he was. Instead of calling each other names, we researched it. When we discovered I was correct, we discussed how the man could become a viable candidate, which gave me a chance to educate a bit. I wasn't familiar with the guy, and The Boy educated me a bit. Neither of us dismissed the opinion of the other. Neither of us called the other names.
The generation gap is our fault, people. We don't respect them but expect them to respect us and respect is a two-way street. Labeling one another is fine, it helps keep our mental files in order, but there are limits. We're all human, with all the things that make us so, and we're all carrying around a myriad of labels. If you don't want to be dismissed for one of your labels, don't dismiss others for theirs.
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